Meet the children . . .

Name:
Tansy

Phase:
Love of learning

Personal Goals for the year:
-To read the intire Lemony Snicket Series (she is on book 6) and the Narnia Series.
-learn French, pig latin and sign language.

Interests:
-reading, drawing, American girl dolls.

She is right now creating the world of Imp. She has been sketching pictures and creating characters and how they live.

If I could do anything in the world I would...

...do what Jesus would want me to do because He will reward me with blessings.

Name:
Tristan

Phase:
Transition into love of learning

personal goals for the year:
-he wants to learn everything he can about dinosaurs
- learn about mathematics (Saxon Math and Mathematicians
are People too)
- read with mom the Dinotopia series
- build a dog house

Interests:
-Dinosaurs, playing with my friends, building things.

If I could do anything in the world...

...I would have 5 puppies.

Name: Liam

Phase: core

Goals for the years: get candy

Interests: Computer games, playing computer games and asking if it is time to play computer games yet.

If I could do anything in the world...

...I would give people $100.

7 questions . . .

I have been thinking about Dr. DeMille's 7 Principles to great teaching lately and how they fit (or if they fit) in our home.

What does 'classics not textbooks' look like in my home?
What does 'you not them' look like in my home?
What does 'inspire not require' look like in my home?
What does 'structure time not content' look like in my home?
What does 'simplicity not complexity' look like in my home?
What does 'quality not conformity' look like in my home?
What does 'mentors not professors' look like in my home?

For the next while I am going to explore these 7 questions and have an answer. Right now the answers are pretty hairy. I am trying to apply the ideals I have into action. That is not an easy thing for a highly idealistic procrastinator to do. I am good at thinking about it and making it look good on paper but not so good at the 'applying to action' part. Sigh.

What came of a nap . . .

This is a post I wrote last month and sent it to a forum I am on. The response was so positive that I thought I'd publish it here and share it with you.

Today was a nightmare...absolute. By 11:30 a.m. I was in tears, pleading to a Father in Heaven to lift me from my frustrations and set me down somewhere near the equator - alone and with a nice cool drink. Do you ever have one of those days?

My children 'got messy' (which by the way, is a motto I created, thinking that it would inspire them to explore as children should- like they need to be inspired to do that! Geesh!) painting one another's faces - what a wonderful start to a day of learning don't you think? Somehow, somewhere it went wrong and I can't tell you how - it happened all so fast. I was left wondering why I had gotten myself into this...and frantically looking for a way to get myself out.

I thought to myself...'we need more structure...bring back a set curriculum to follow...bring back the conveyor belt'...but of course I had been there- done that and structuring content doesn't work...it isn't best. I knew that. Sending them back to public school wasn't an option either...I know too much and I've come too far to go back now...I had to think of something else...

How was I going to honour my children's phases? How was I going to teach them the lessons of the love of learning phase and still make them accountable for their learning? How was I going to inspire my children to think that learning is more fun than anything else? How am I going to inspire my children that books are awesome and that they can learn anything they want from them? So in finding an answer to these questions I did the only thing a mother can...

I took a nap.

Afterwards the answers came when the tears had stopped and my sinuses drained. I want to share what I came up with and I hope you don't mind. It may not be for you but it is another break through in our home...

My children have a few rules during our scheduled time (not content) -no computer games, no television, no friends. Learning time is family time and it is fun time. However, they really love these three things and so fun family learning time has become something to get through so that they can get to the 'real fun' - computer games, television (movies really) and friends. And yet when they let themselves at it they love to learn...if they let themselves at it...sigh.

Anyway, I get a lot of...'mom, I did my zones (chores), I read a chapter in my book, yeah it was good. I learned I should be nice or something. I drew a picture - it's a flower or a bird, I can't remember. 2x4 is 8, so can I call Tabatha? Can I watch a movie (curse Disney!)? to which I reply 'no' and when I try to explain why I am saying no, they can't hear me because they are in tantrum-mode about how cruel I am and that I couldn't possibly be their real mother...and how they wished they could run away to Nintendo land or where ever. Can you empathize?

So...here's what I did...I wrote a list of things that they needed to answer before they could do the 'really fun' things they wanted to. Then I got really silly (naps help with that)...I grabbed a yard stick and I talked in a German accent (a really bad rendition of Einstein) and I sat them down on the floor before me. I thwacked them with the yard stick when they got unruly (truly! they laughed their heads off - I don't know why but they love when I do that. It doesn't hurt them because of course I don't hit them really hard but it makes a loud 'thwack' and that sends them into hysterics - I would suggest you buy a yard stick for this very comedic purpose)...anyway, for the next 20 minutes I explained to them that if they could answer these 12 questions they could play computer, watch television and have friends over all at the same time if they wanted.

1. Did you FILL UP your mind with stories?
I had a big glass and a jug of juice to demonstrate. I said, 'this glass is your mind and this jug of cool sweet juice is stories'. I asked my son if he filled his mind up with stories, he said "YES". I gave him the I-think-your-telling-a-whopper look. So I poured a little juice in the cup ...not even enough to swallow. I then asked my daughter who read a chapter in her book the same question and I gave her a swallows worth. I then explained as I poured the glass to the top with juice that THIS is filling up your mind with stories and I drank it down (and burped for effect - how ladylike I know).
2. Did you EXPLORE and ask lots of QUESTIONS?
We talked about exploring and what that could be...exploring in books, music, art, nature, the back yard, up our nose (I have two sons), on field trips, in our imagination, in the Lego box...etc

3. Did you LOOK FOR ANSWERS in lots of BOOKS?

4. Did you work on your weekly goals?
My son is in cub scouts and my daughter through our church have goals they work on and complete until they are 12. Each Sunday they pick one goal to work on during the week.

5. Did you read to Liam?
He is our core phaser 5 year old and we are all responsible to read to him or tell him a story of some sort.

6. Did you do something NICE for someone in the family?

7. Did you LISTEN to GOD'S WORDS?
Each morning we read as a family from our central classic.

8. Did you FEEL for the HOLY GHOST?
I discussed that this was a time for quiet and reflection...prayer perhaps or just thinking about good things. It's a time where they try to feel peace and love from God. I want them to have a connection with their Saviour and making ourselves still takes practise. I want them to start now.

9. Did you listen RESPECTFULLY to mommie when she taught you something new?
We have a problem with interrupting and leaving the room when I have something to share. I underlined this one and told my 5 year old that he was responsible for this one most of all...

10. Did you FILL your JOURNALS with what you DID or what you LEARNED or what you FELT or what you DREAMED of or what you LOVE today?
Journaling is a must but how they do it is up to them. My youngest journals in picture form, sometimes I take dictation. Sometimes they scrapbook with pictures or items they found (feathers, dead bugs and such>things) or words...my son (8) writes sometimes in point form.

11. Did you do your zones (chores)?

and most importantly...

12. DID YOU DO YOUR BEST?

I promised them that by the end of the year they won't need this list because they would be doing these things naturally. I promised they won't need to even ask me if they can play at a friends, they'd say, "mom, I am going over to Tabatha's now, see you before dinner" and I'd be okay with that. I promised them that they would think learning is more fun than any old Disney movie - Scouts honour even!

And they jumped up and started a day of learning even when formal learning time had been over hours ago! NO LIES! What is most important is that each day I am answering these questions too. I am learning right along with them. I ask what they are interested in and then I get books and start reading in front of them. I get into it. I'm excited about dinosaurs or bugs or Japan (except when we found a dead salamander during our walk that had been run over by a vehicle and his poor insides where on his poor outsides...I just couldn't join in with the poking and natural curiosity that boys have...anatomy will be left up to someone other mentor thank you very much!) I have weekly goals too and a journal that I draw, paste and write in. I ask a million questions (lately the reoccurring questions are 'what have I gotten myself into?' and 'why me?') but I am looking through books to find the answers too. I share when I can and I take the time to listen to my children when they just can't wait but tell me what they found!

It means leaving my comfort zone but as Abigail Adams wrote to her 9 year old son,

"These are the times in which a genius would wish to live. It is not in the still calm of life or in the repose of a pacific station that great characters are formed. The habits of a vigorous mind are formed when contending with difficulties."

Inspire not Require

Inspire not require is one of the most difficult principles to apply in leadership education. I have been struggling with it for a long time but I think I made a break through last night!

I went to a discussion with some liber-mom's in our community to discuss what core phase and love of learning looks like in our homes. Many of us are having conveyor belt education hangovers (well, I know I am). This sharing between friends inspired some deep thinking on the matter. I know my biggest obstacle is this Inspire business. My mind began to focus on how Sunday School works. I recalled the many times I have taught toddlers, young children, youth and adults at church. I began to recall how I have been taught in Sunday school and Eureka! I realized the key to Inspire not Require!

How does a Sunday School class work? We are invited to come and listen. We invite others to - come and listen. Simple. No tests. No written reports. No demands. No expectations. The teacher provides information and invites the student to hear it.

If I had a class that seemed uninterested I wouldn't get mad. I never forced anyone to accept the Sunday lessosns. If I had a problem, I simply asked myself the question, "What does this group need?" or "What does this child need?" and then I would prayerfully try to find the answer. If I was losing a classes interest I wouldn't give them detention or homework. I never would scold. I would try to find a way to reach them. I would engage them in discussion. I would ask them to help me in someway, whether holding a picture or writing on the board for me. I never demanded it of them they could decline if they wanted.

If I needed my class to be more reverent - I became more reverent. If I needed them to understand their scriptures better I began to study them more diligently myself. If I needed more kindness in the class I was more kind to the students and to others. I endeavored to be always an example to follow.

I tried dilligently to speak from my heart, inviting them to learn the words of God. I invited discussion - a sharing of personal experiences and ideas. Nothing submitted was ever wrong or out of context - never a pass or fail - I tried to fit what was said by a student into what we were learning. Everything could apply. If a child was unsure I would simply give him the answer or ask someone else to help out. There was no pressure to learn.

There was always routine in class. We did things a certain way - the lessons were pre-planned but I was always flexible depending on where the class was in their lives. I didn't worry about making every planned point or even finishing the lesson if the discussion took us down a different avenue and it was a good avenue to go down. I used the spirit to guide the class.

If a child was unruly I only reminded him of the rules. I never yelled or scolded. Sometimes I would take the child to a parent if the child was crying for them or if the child was being too disruptive. It wasn't a punishment. It was just a way of saying ' When you don't disrupt our group you can return.' The child was always invited back whether it was the next moment or the next Sunday.

This is Inspire not Require! This is the type of model I am trying to use in my home. It just feels right to me.

What's your Everest?

I've been told and I believe that the sure way to success is to keep the end in mind and to work hard until you get there. When we started home based learning I had to honestly ask myself why I was doing this.

What am I trying to accomplish in my home anyway?
Am I willing to do the work - make the sacrifices - take the heat to get there?

I came up with a list of objectives . . .

1. We are preparing to meet God.


2. We are preparing for our life missions/purpose to make the world a better place.


3. We are establishing a tradition of life learning through Leadership education.


4. We are preparing to be self sufficient.
   

With this end in mind we go forth each day. It isn't easy. It is the hardest thing I've yet to do. Motherhood is demanding as it is, some days I wonder why I took on this added responsibility of home educating. It isn't that I think that I am better than other mothers or other educators for that matter. Why do some people look at Mount Everest and wish to plant their flag on the top of it? I do it because the option is there and I would love the opportunity to teach my children - to take on the challenge and see it through to the end. So I've taken it with my little flag in hand.

Many people have told me that they could never do it because they don't have the patience. I have stopped saying that they could do it and that they would find the patience. They don't home school because they don't want to - isn't it wonderful how that works! I am not being sarcastic or judgemental in the least. I have been baffled by rumors that home school moms think they are better than the average mother. Teaching my children at home interests me. It is my passion. I don't expect everyone to have the same passions, that would be terribly dull. We all have different dreams and visions for ourselves - or maybe we don't - perhaps we all want the same things we just have different ways of going about getting to that 'end'. What a wonderful life this is to have freedom to choose for ourselves what we do with this time we have!

We all have our Everest's to climb - this is mine. I hope you all the best in climbing yours. Truly I do. I am here cheering you on your way as you ascend it. I believe you can do it.

Lessons from the wild...

May I share with you a few lessons I learned when I went on a 7 day canoe trip in the BC Rockies last June? I am really glad that I was able to spend that time with my father but I also took away some life changing (I am all about change) lessons from the mountains...

It was a challenging experience up in the wild...but extremely rewarding. I came away with two impressions. The first was from the mountains themselves. Each morning I awoke to them, as I travelled they lorded over me, constant and overwhelming in their beauty. As I started to look with poetic eyes, I viewed them as my sisters.

The mountains are 'woman' in the sense that they steal and break hearts. My father has gone on this canoe trip (a 117 kilometre circuit of trials and lakes...mostly lakes) every June for eleven years now and said that he will continue to come back until he can no longer physically do it. These mountains have stolen his heart completely and they began to steal mine.

I had to ask myself why...what is it about them? It is her beauty true but there is more...what truly wins the heart of man is her generosity and pure integrity. She is always giving - giving scenic delight - cool breeze to us when we were canoeing under the hot sun - crisp glacier streams when we were thirsty - the lush vegetation all about us...and yet on the flip side she is exact and brutal - true to herself without apology and this struck me most of all - winds could come up and weather changed quickly - the breeze to our back could change and blow at us on the lake - the lush vegetation could become a labyrinth of no return if we wandered off too far -the wildlife was unpredictable and we had to be on guard for bear - mosquitoes were a constant blithe and so on. Many a man have lost their lives in her bosom. She breaks hearts without apology. No regret for it and yet, men love her still. We could curse the cold winds and rains that came from her as we paddled to our next camp. It did not phase her. The mountain is what she is and yet she is always changing.

My father says that the wild is never the same. Each year the lakes change - the land changes. It changes where it needs to. It repairs where it is needed. Something falls away, burns away, rots away (a tree...a mountain stream...a rock slide down one side of the mountain) as is needed.

I want to be like the mountain - firm and unmovable but always changing. I want to live without apology for who I am - generous - a pillar of integrity. That is the lesson I took from my 'sister' mountains.

But I also took away another lesson. The scenic beauty of the mountain starts very small. It is made up of the tiniest treasures. As I portaged along trails I began to notice the forest floor. When the trees hide the peeks my eyes rested downward to the plants growing there - mosses, flower, fern, grass, mushroom, shrubs - oh so green. Each different from the next. I think that I am a botanist at heart, my camera took many a picture of these green gems of the forest. They indeed make up the very wilderness.

If you were to look with a critical eye -an unhappy eye - you would see much flaw in the wild. Fallen and rotting trees, lots of them. Yet as you soften your eye you would see what these gems do. Mosses cover the rot, flowers thrive at the base of tree stumps, ferns blanket about the fallen trees. I realized that there is a subtle beauty to the mountain region that builds up and grows into it's overwhelming allure.

It is the same with people. We each are a scenic creation but we are essentially created by individual subtle beauties. We all have flaws just like the forest and we must! For, like the forest, if we didn't then there would be no need for the mosses, the ferns, the flowers and those, poor reader (as I am ranting terribly) make up exactly what the forest is. I see a little more clearly that we each are made up of little things that add to the amazing charm and splendour that is woman (or man).

Each flaw is an opportunity for literally- new growth. I embrace flaw (sorry for the overused cliche) I change flaw where I can but like the mountain I live without apology. I consist of flaw - and your are welcome for it - I believe now more than ever that it is only through mistake that we can grow bigger, brighter and better. Of course I mean that in changing and learning from mistake and flaws this can only happen...does that make sense?

It is through subtle beauty that we thrive. The grand comes from the small and subtle -an accumulation of the small and subtle - Anyway, this is very long but I hope a little thrilling. It was a self changing experience and I would recommend it to every woman. I hope I described what I learned well enough but I fear (unless this is common knowledge to all and I am just slow on the up take...as could very well be the case) it is a lesson best learned on a weeks expedition into the wild and not through second hand telling (or babbling). I hope it inspired where it might...